What’s Next?

Fruit trees with painted trunks.

Today I felt filled with an enormous dread, watching the attempted coup by a president who won’t acknowledge the results of a valid election, watching the followers who enable him to keep undermining the vote. I had felt relieved after the votes were counted. Perhaps we were back to more ordinary times and struggles–certainly the struggles were not over, but some semblance of a social order were on track to be restored.

But then I read an account by someone who had lived through a coup in their own country, Sri Lanka, who said that America is already having one right now, and I sank into a kind of terror. I won’t repeat their story here–you can read it via the link. Just to say that undermining faith in the results of an election can disrupt the very fabric of a fragile democracy, and is an invitation to ongoing chaos.

In my dread, I went outside–into a cloudy warm day–perhaps the last of these summer-like days–where Margy was working in the yard. She got in the hammock with me and I could just feel all the feelings of terror, but with the comfort of love, the comfort of the earth and sky. I certainly don’t have the answers for what we can do, what anyone can do, about this coup. I hope someone who might have the power and the answers is talking about it somewhere.

The other thing that, ironically, has relieved my anxieties about the election and the coup is a novel I have been reading about climate change. It is the latest work by Kim Stanley Robinson, The Ministry for the Future. Set in the very near future, the title refers to an international agency that is formed to be a voice for future generations in the international arena. It’s a fragmented sort of novel, with each chapter a small piece in a larger fabric, and only a few on-going characters to help keep the thread going. Like in some of his other works, Robinson’s characters are trying out all sorts of ideas to turn around or mitigate the catastrophes of climate warming. Perhaps it will get more hopeful as I keep reading, but for now, it is sobering. So the terrors of a coup are replaced by the terrors of climate catastrophe–but those terrors are more familiar to me.

In the meantime, Margy and I seize the opportunity of our own strange weather to replenish the soil in our little part of the earth–another visit to the beach to get more seaweed, more sifting of compost (to get the roots and stones out) to put near the fruit trees, raspberries, bushes in the back of the yard. As much compost as I can sift, I put it somewhere. As much seaweed as we can collect, we put it somewhere.

For the fruit trees, also, a few weeks ago I painted their trunks white. There is a whole story to this. I had read about painting the trunks of trees white to protect them from sun damage in the winter, to protect from insects burrowing. But when I first read about it, people were talking about using latex paint, and that didn’t feel true to the spirit of organic permaculture.

Then, this fall, searching the web for another project–looking for food safe paints–I came across milk paint. This is the old-fashioned white wash that Tom Sawyer used, that most people used before the modern age. It’s made of natural ingredients: milk proteins, lime, and pigments. It has no VOCs to emit, no scents to be allergic to. It came in a powder that I mixed with water, in the amount I needed for the trees. The powder will last a long time, but the mixed paint only a couple weeks. So I painted the tree trunks. You can use it for lots of things, not just trees. Finding resources that cause no harm to the earth–that help the earth–these are like little miracles that never cease to delight me.

5 thoughts on “What’s Next?

  1. “Filled with an enormous dread”–yes. This has settled into me too, for the same reasons. My husband and I are trying a technique of only talking about this dread for 10 minutes a day, hoping that will help us keep our health and sanity in the months to come. I think we have to take comfort in rituals and the earth, like you’re doing–keeping calm and carrying on, “chopping wood and carrying water,” doing our small part. Thank you for capturing this. (And that’s so cool about milk paint!)

  2. “Filled with an enormous dread”–yes. This has settled into me too, for the same reasons. My husband and I are trying a technique of only talking about this dread for 10 minutes a day, hoping that will help us keep our health and sanity in the months to come. I think we have to take comfort in rituals and the earth, like you’re doing–keeping calm and carrying on, “chopping wood and carrying water,” doing our small part. Thank you for capturing this. (And that’s so cool about milk paint!)

  3. The dread is real. I read the link to the Sri Lanka coup because I keep reading things, thinking they will help, but often they make me numb, or maybe it’s paralyzed. I also think of Havel in the Czech Republic and those who have survived chaos and coups. In one way they give hope– because people have survived them and kept hope alive; but in other ways the dread is still there as an ongoing undercurrent. Seeing my five year old granddaughter who is full of life, spunk, love and hope helps. She has no dread, and I’d like for her world to stay dreadless. There’s always the “you never know…” concept. You never know — things might not be as dreadful as I think.! Good to read about your milk paint, and to know that the real world, of seasons and nature, persists whatever we humans do. I’ve never done it, but an alternative even to milk paint, especially if you want to avoid lye, is tear up old white sheets into long, narrow strips and use them to wrap trees.

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